An Old Farmer’s Advice

I got this in an email yesterday and have been thinking about it since… So here it is:


Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong.

Keep skunks and bankers at a distance.

Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.

A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.

Words that soak into your ears are whispered…not yelled.

Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.

Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads.

Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.

It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.

You cannot unsay a cruel word.

Every path has a few puddles.

When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.

The best sermons are lived, not preached.

Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen anyway.

Don't judge folks by their relatives.

Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll enjoy it a second time.

Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't bothering you none.

Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a Rain dance.

If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.

Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.

The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with, watches you from the mirror every mornin'.

Always drink upstream from the herd.

Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.

Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in.

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

Don't pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight, he may just haveta kill ya.

Rolling Along

So, once again, I am behind on my correspondence. It has been a hectic, and more-than-faintly-evil few weeks.

Since last I've written, I thought I'd found a job, then got scammed out of $1850.00 by the company I was working for. It seems that they like paying us work-for-hire temps with counterfeit USPS money orders… Not a steller moment on my part to be sure… Though to be fair (to myself) both our bank and the US Post Office told me that they were some of the best forgeries they'd ever seen…

Still… Fuckers… Makes my already tenuous love of "humanity" all that more — well — tenuous…

Sometimes I think Tarzan was right… Humanity sucks…

Then I remember my friends and family…

Then I remember that Tarzan had Jane, his son Korak, and was friends with the Waziri… So, okay I can live with that… If Tarzan can have friends then so can I. The rest of you feel free to get off my planet. Especially all you weasels… 

In other "news" I haven't written a word in weeks (other than posts like this or on my new Twitter and Facebook pages) but I have been doing some art/design work, which has been fun. Stuff for our new website (which hasn't gone live yet) as well as some for a client putting together a new non-profit agency.

The job hunt continues… I had my first interview in 15 years on Tuesday with a technology based temp agency called LionBridge. I should hear in a few days whether I passed muster, or not.

Beyond all this, everything else is moving along very smoothly…

I hope it is the same for all of you!

Ciao for now!

Why is a raven like a writing desk?*

It seems appropriate that after the last couple of weeks, I put up a riddle inspired by the Mad Hatter, as that is exactly how I feel.

To much to do, to little time… Which is what the Hatter was supposed to get the chopping block for: according to the Red Queen, he had to die for "murdering time."

So now we know where to place the blame. Damn Hatter!


I am once more back on the job hunt, though it has both been slow, as well as more than once put aside to do other things…

One of those things I've put it aside for is that my wonderful wife and I are now in the business of domain and website hosting. Check out the animated badge to the left of this post, (or go here: The Host Ship). It seemed a natural fit, as we both have extensive histories in the computer field. She with coding and project management, me with technical support as well as in marketing and graphic design.

So, if you ever have a need (or want) for your own domain, or website, check us out at The Host Ship. We'll take excellent care of you!


Also keep an eye out for our next project, which will hopefully go live in the next month or so.

Dark Alley Designs

Wait till you see what we've got cooked up for you!


One last thing: I am in need of a new name for my athletics blog… I've though of a few, but nothing that REALLY gets me going. How about any of you? Any ideas?

Don't be shy, please let me know, either here in the comments, or via email.

 Ciao for now!


*No one knows the answer to the riddle. When Alice gave up guessing, even the Hatter admitted that he did not have an answer. 

From Wikipidea: "Lewis Carroll originally intended the riddle to be just a riddle without an answer, but after many requests from readers, he and others, including puzzle expert Sam Loyd, thought up possible answers to the riddle. One possible answer is "Poe wrote on both", a reference to Edgar Allan Poe, who wrote The Raven
In the preface to the 1896 edition, Carroll wrote:
'Enquiries have been so often addressed to me, as to whether any answer to the Hatter’s Riddle can be imagined, that I may as well put on record here what seems to me to be a fairly appropriate answer, viz: "Because it can produce a few notes, though they are very flat; and it is nevar put with the wrong end in front!'"

As noted in The Annotated Alice, given that later editions "corrected" the word "nevar" as "never", the subtle wordplay with the reverse spelling of "raven" was lost on most of his readers.